Last week I was talking to my colleagues about my son’s preschool and the conversation trailed to our own preschool, and suddenly it turned out that one of my colleague was… my classmate in kindergarten!!! Can you believe it? We have been working together for almost a year, occasionally have lunches together and do not recognize each other!!! Hahaha so irony!
Trying to recall the memory lane, apparently both of us only remembered one classmate’s name each; namely our best friend back then. It’s the best friend that you line up with, sit next to, and basically do everything together. Seriously, both of us can’t recall any other names (except of this one fat cute boy hahaha). Then we search back the class photo and manage to recall a few other names, although the memories quite vague.
This makes me conclude that back then you usually have only one best friend, or two. Then when you are in primary school, you have a circle of friends. Of coz high school was all about popularity, being in the ‘group’. In college, the circle got wider and more diverse. The more friends you have in facebook (or back then friendster), the more excited you were. (I can’t remember why anymore as I have past that phase).
Then enter working life. Your so called-friends mainly revolve around your colleagues as you meet and have lunch with them almost everyday. Nevertheless efforts to have colleagues as friends don’t always work out. For professional reasons, there are better to remain as colleagues. So looks like the number of friends have normal curve shape (bell shape). It peaked in the teen and then again subsides.
Well…you promise to be ‘friends forever’ or ‘keep in touch’ with everyone, but as you gets older, you will only keep in touch with a handful of them. In my case, I can say I still keep in touch with roughly 10% of them (oh I’m so not happening!). Keep in touch meaning you actually talk or at least sms, not just virtually via fb status.
Then there’s also this ‘un’friend concept, also introduced by facebook haha… I guess when you get older, you don’t like crowd that much and un’friend’ those whom no longer there for you, physically or emotionally. In contrast, some disconnect themselves from social network due to personal reasons such as yet-to-marry, yet-to-get 1st baby, post-partum depression, etc. I understand the world now is a hard place to live so to have the social network add to pressures can be a heavy burden.
There were also friends who talk behind your back, and those who you haven’t meet for many years but can still click over a coffee session. This reminded me a quote I read somewhere saying there are friends for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. I realised that I have friends from all the three categories and I thanked Allah for giving me chance to enjoy such beautiful friendships with so many colorful people in my life.
To my friends,
Although in future I might loss memories of some names (I hope not!), I really cherish our friendship.
I believe you have made me to be a better person.
Forgive me for any wrongdoings, believe me it’s unintentional.
Thank you for the friendship. If I can turn back time, you will still be my friend:).