I think I made a mistake by introducing AE to the office

I think I made a mistake by bringing AE to the office on weekends.

[I have to come to the office once in a fortnight for my report].

At first, it was like a win-win situation. I don’t have to sneak out from our home and rushing to complete my report. Additionally, AE seems to enjoy the empty department. He had so much fun kicking my stress ball with hubby and running from my place to the end and back again 20 times. Then he filled up my tupperware bottle with water, wash his face a bit, playing with the blind window, and coloring.

However lately, he keeps on saying he wants to follow me to the office even during weekday. I tried reasoning to him that unlike weekends, he can’t come to the office during weekday but of course a 2-year old find such information is hard to comprehend.

To explain the meaning of ‘weekday vs weekend’ is one thing. To comprehend the meaning of ‘daycare’ and ‘office’ is another thing. One day he even said “Tu office ashman” (while pointing to a building). Nie belum campur nak explain angah oncall malam2 kat hospital lagik..huhuhu….[pernah jugak drama malam minggu “nak angah nak angah!” kat luar hospital okeh…]

I told him the office was full with people and kids are not allowed. I’m trying hard not to create fairytale stories like “evil boss” just yet :). In principle, I just don’t like the idea of frightening kids with ghost / police / crazy people, but things might change based on our tolerance in reasoning and explaining :).

Anyway, as a result of the ‘office fun’, AE sometimes now wake up early morning and persuades me to bring him along to the office. He doesn’t whine but instead speak so softly it tears my heart apart. Thus after the reasoning-explaining session the crying will start and separation becomes harder. *sigh*

I think it’s not that he doesn’t really comprehend what I meant, but he just can’t accept it. Coz when we picked him up later at the daycare at the end of the day, he even repeats what I say “tak boley pergi ofis, ramai orang” (cannot go the office, many people) means he understand what I’m saying.

The only solution I have now is to send him early in the morning (half an hour earlier than usual) so that he won’t wake up just yet. [So far he’s okay when I carry him to daycare if he’s still very sleepy].

I love you so much Ashman Ehsan. Memang kalau boley mummy nak bawak pergi ofis hari2 tapi apakan daya nie bukan bisnes keluarga sendiri. Satu share pun mummy takde. Tunggu yek mummy bukak bisnes sendiri and jadi CEO. Hehehe…amin…

his first ever real ride alone. He said he wanted to ride, but from his look he didn't expect he will ride it alone. Well, no tears. Mummy so proud:)

he barely move at all throughout the ride. Reminded me so much of my own childhood:)

but unlike mummy, you love animal and not afraid to pet them - Sunway Lagoon Pet Village

loves of my life! posing lentok cam mummy:)

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of Frisbee and Freedom of Speech

About a week prior to the Bersih 2.0, over breakfast, one of my colleagues asked me something in the line of:

“so in U.S they surely don’t have any demonstration rite?”

I wanted to say yes, but then give his question a thought for a moment.

“Well…actually no. You can say it happen every fortnight”

“About what?”

“Well…actually about almost everything under the sun.”

Back in the town where I study, there is a square located in between the university and the state administration building. It is basically a lawn with a fountain where people play frisbee and read story book during the summer. There is also a small stage for anyone to talk, to preach, and to say whatever they want. It’s like an outlet for them to apply their freedom of speech. [By stage I meant a very small square fit for 1-2 persons with 3 steps].

At first it was a very peculiar view to me. How someone had such a confidence to stand there and talk. But after a while living in U.S and realizing how American culture is, I find it is actually a normal view to see people demo and practice at that square. Some common and repeating themes are minimum wage, abortion, (someone even asked me whether I’m pro- life or pro-choice and I’m like… “errr…..” hehehe…), sweat shop (okay I was so ignorant I didn’t know what this meant at that time), domestic violence, and homosexual rights. Well, like I said, they talked about everything under the planet.

I find such environment is much contradicted to my home place, where people are more quiet and reserve. I guess the education system does play a role in it. Here, majority of the students generally just keep quiet with their heads down at the end of the lecture when the professor asks “Anyone have any question?”

Meanwhile in U.S, I saw students raised their hands to ask questions even at the beginning of the class. In some classes, students can’t stop giving opinions until the end of the class…[I experienced this in my Ethic 341 Contemporary Moral Issues]. So I guess there is nothing peculiar about standing in the middle of that square if you want to be heard as long as you do it in peace.

So when the next day the newspaper reported about suggestion from the government for the Bersih 2.0 demo to be held at a stadium, I thought oh wow…looks like they are talking something like the ‘square’ idea I mentioned earlier over breakfast.

Anyway, this story is out-dated. You guys know how it ends;).

By the way, now that I’m a mummy, how do you think we should change our education system so that students speak out more?

fear of regret than fear of failure

Things are a bit packed this month. I keep on postponing writing in this blog (the ideas were there, I just couldn’t find the time to pour it out), until today when I wanted to write and look at the calendar – – – OMG it’s already 20th???

We are already halfway through July and I don’t even realise it??? Wait, this can’t be right. I opened up the online newspaper and it said Wednesday, July 13th. Okay computer!!! Why are you bringing one whole week forward??? It isn’t funny coz I have report to submit and puasa to ganti okehh!!! Oh just imagine if that happened in real life. Like you just lost 1 whole week without noticing how it passed by. Cewah macam cerita 13 going on 30 pulak:) [I like that story btw]

Anyway, I just wanna share share you something Ryan Seacrest tweet earlier on how the Duke and Duchess politely turn down offer to be ‘on air’ with him. The official reply read like this:

“It’s very kind of you to offer the Duke and Duchess on Ryan’s radio show. I very sorry to say, however, that the couple will not be undertaking any interviews during their tour of Canada and California, or before or immediately after it. This is normal practice for members of the royal family when an official overseas visit occurs. Furthermore the Duke and Duchess actually very rarely take part in interviews at all. Sorry to be sending a disappointing response, but hope you enjoy their visit to California.”

I really smiled reading that statement. Of course they rarely give interviews. Some more, this is ‘on air’, celebrity vibes kind of interview. But it actually amazed me how Ryan and his team tried to pursue something like this. It’s like nothing is impossible in their work ethic. Just give it a try, nothing to lose.

It also reminded me of this one quotation I read in Reader’s Digest from a lady who changed her career from a surgeon to a shoe designer (sorry I forgot her name). In view of her career change, the interviewer asked whether at first she was worried of what other people like her relatives will say. Her respond is
I fear of regret more than fear of failure.
If I tried and fail, so be it. At least I already tried. If not, I will be forever regret not having to try to pursue it.

Now I’m kind of reminding myself that reasoning whenever I’m too afraid to try something:)

Btw, isn’t Duchess Kate a lovely lady. Love her dress! It was reported that she brought 40 dresses in her 12 days official visit to U.S (rajin reporter tu kira). Sometimes it feels better to read news on duchess’ dress or the newly arrival Harper Seven Beckham coz the current news tak abis abis dengan Bersih, Patriot, whatever, sangat memenatkan untuk baca….