Two of my BFF gave birth last Ramadan to wonderful adorable boys. (banyak baby boys tahun nie). Congratulations friends!!!
While talking to them, I’ve realised this one common thing. 1st time parents (including myself) are usually not aware of the post partum blues. We are so excited to get the baby out, and never really give a long thought on what to happen after that.
The topic is seldom discussed between friends. You talk about labor. You even talk about episiotomy, but seldom about the post partum period of tirednes and frustration. I don’t know why exactly. Is it a taboo subject?
Maybe it makes you feel incompetent to talk about it. Maybe coz nobody ever asked? Hence when it happens, people think it only happen to you thus makes you feel sad and lost.
Some common problems that I heard and experience myself: nipple crack, insufficient milk, confused on the food intake (what you can eat and what you can’t eat), and of course the crying baby.
In jungling all these new experiences, you did not realise your body is actually lacking of energy (just how many bloodpint you have lost in giving birth). You require a lot of rest. In fact the book said you should sleep whenever the baby sleep and ignore any household chores.
Next, you are alone. (of course your husband is there but only at night). Even if your mom is there, you are without friends or colleagues for at least 60 days. It is different with your old life. Thus, it can make you feel lonely.
Summing up all these tiredness + sleepless night + pressure to be a supermom + lonely = STRESS. Of course you will feel stress. It is normal to do so.
I’m glad now some women start to talk about it. Like Brooke Shields and Wardina Safiyah. When information is shared, you can share your experiences and help each other to find solution. Thus now I’m doing the same thing.
So mummies, don’t be too stress during the blues. It is common, it happen to everyone. It will go away. Just take one step at a time.
Try to talk to those positive-minded persons that can help you. For example during my confinement, when we complained about the sleepless night, one of my friends Noris said, “takpe..sekejap je. pasnie okay and it will be more fun”. We were like…*btol ke sekejap, rasa mcm dah lama giler*. But she was right after all:). After 2-3 months, we have manage to adapt. Remember, the crying might not go away, but somehow you adapt 🙂
To the fathers-to-be, please be extra considerate. New mommies can get so emotional to the extend you will not understand them. So just try to tolerate, at least for this period.
Okie dokie for now, enjoy the last bit of Syawal. Sesape yg free, do drop by to our home sweet home;).